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Coming Soon...
Scene 5 – Planet Frammenwhanger - DesertCaption Deep in the veldt, an elite regiment of VIMP “Panzer Picas” (earless rabbits from South America – South American Nazi émigrés!) swarm forwards on the backs of tanks – the VIMP banner flying and looking terribly polished and aggressive. Radio: An efficient Panzer Pica tank crewman reports to the commander in a neighbouring tank. Radio jingle Pica crewman 1 Pica Captain A scout on the ground suddenly holds up a hand, looking cautious. Everyone freezes in fright. Pica scout The Scout is suddenly pressed against a tree bole, gripped with fear. Pica scout The Picas nervously probe forwards, weapons quaking in their hands. Pica captain We see the Tank Vixen’s tank, broken down with its hood up. Sonya and Firen have their heads under the bonnet and their arses – in cut offs – pointing at the Picas. Pica captain Terrified Panzer Pica. So nicely oil-smeared and innocent, Sonya and Firen look up from their broken-down tank. They are wearing tank tops (stretched to the breaking point) and cut off jeans – oil smears and tousled hair. Firen Sonya Sonya perches her glasses on the edge of her nose, looking so sweaty and sultry... (ooh! Evil cow! Back – back, I say! Erk – my heart!) A Pica explodes! Sonya SFX In a panic, the Pica Captain turns around. His men join him. Pica Captain - Think of home! SFX Pica Captain The Picas can now only see Sona and Firen’s shadows on the sand. Picas clutch their groins – unable to take it. Firen Just think – two slim, blonde girls caught out in all this heat. Their thin tank tops slowly soaking through with sweat. Their bodies chafing at the restriction of their tight, hot, drum-taut little shorts… Pica 1 Pica 2 Standing before the Picas, Firen does a stretch, pouring water from an evian bottle all down her cleavage. Firen The Pica Captain quakes. Sonya and Firen hold each other, pouty – looking a little chastened. Heads hanging. Pica captain Sonya But sometimes… Pica Captain Close up of Sonya, play-acting a little blush of shame and arousal. Sonya The Pica’s begin to explode, feint, flee, or have out-of-body experiences. Dozens and dozens of the pathetic little bastards collapse and fall Idiot Picas Out-of-body Pica Gedda, dressed in panties and a tank top, crawls out from under the engine of their tank, oil smeared and sweaty. Karin is under the tank as well, reading a magazine. Gedda is irritably pulling her panties out of the crack of her arse. Gedda Pica Firen A busted hydraulic line spurts gooey white fluid all over Gedda’s tank top and panties. Pica’s have heart attacks as they watch. Gedda Gedda strips off, doing a lovely ‘lift’ as she takes off her tank top. Picas fall in their dozens. Gedda Sheltering in a half track full of terrified, cringing Picas who are all trying to hide, the Pica Scout radios for help. A beer cooler is beside him. Pica scout. Gedda stands naked over the terrified Picas in the half track, giving them all a prize upward view. Gedda Gedda gets a long necked beer bottle – cap still on (“Sputnik larger – for that great potato taste!”) Gedda Gedda obviously opens the bottle by ‘other means’ OC. Show the Picas – who watch – having heart attacks. GEDDA SFX Pop! Fizzzzzzzzz! Gedda stalks off, drinking happily. The Picas all seem to have died in spot. One Pica has the bottle cap. Sonya and Firen watch Gedda go, deeply impressed. Pica with bottle cap Firen Sonya Only the Pica Captain is left. He has a trembling gun pointed at Sonya and Firen, who stand there slinky and unconcerned. The Pica Captain is weaving on his feet. Pica Captain Anni comes out from behind the tank in a wet wet WET tee shirt, full of well meaning happiness and totally devoid of brain cells. Anni Pica Captain Nice full shot of Anni, wet tee shirt, posing beside the wet, freshly washed tank. Anni is helpful, sweet, concerned and dumb as a post. Anni Sonya and Firen inspect the Pica Captain He has crumbled like a busted jigsaw puzzle. Pica Captain Firen
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All images are the sole property of Paul Kidd and their respective creators.
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